Alfred the Cake 蛋糕1阿尔弗雷德 KING ALFRED was the first Good King, with the exception of Good King Wenceslas, who, though he looked 4th, really came first (it is not known, however, what King Wenceslas was King of). Alfred ought never to be confused with King Arthur, equally memorable but probably non-existent and therefore perhaps less important historically (unless he did exist). 阿尔弗雷德国王2（King Alfred）是第一位好国王，当然，除了好国王温切拉斯3（Good King Wenceslas）之外。温切拉斯看起来排第四位，实际上是第一个出场的（然而我们也不确定，温切拉斯究竟是英国哪个王国的国王）。大家不要把阿尔弗雷德和亚瑟王4弄混了，虽然亚瑟王跟前者名气相当，但很可能不存在，所以历史地位没那么重要（除非他确实存在）。 ...

Hi，这里是《仙人周刊》，我的一周精神生活总结。🎈 停了很久没写，因为手「坏」了。 我的左手患上了肘管综合征，无法正常弯曲。一屈肘，便像撞到了麻筋似的，酸爽非常……无名指和小指也 24 小时处于麻痹状态，指腹针扎一般，不停地「放电」。 ...

Britain Conquered Again 不列颠第三次被征服 THE conversion of Britain was followed by a Wave of Danes, accompanied by their sisters or Sagas, and led by such memorable warriors as Harold Falsetooth and Magnus the Great, who, landing correctly in Thanet, overran the country from right to left, with fire. 不列颠皈依基督教之后，丹麦人来了。他们携着姐妹，唱着萨迦1，在令人难忘的战士像哈罗德·福尔斯图斯2（Harold Falsetooth）和马格努斯大帝3（Magnus the Great）的带领下，成功在塞内特登陆，用烈火从右到左洗劫了整个国家。 ...

The Conversion of England 英格兰的皈依 NOTICING some fair-haired children in the slave market one morning, Pope Gregory, the memorable Pope, said (in Latin), ‘What are those? ’ and on being told that they were Angels, made the memorable joke ‘Non Angli, sed Angeli’ (‘not Angels but Anglicans’) and commanded one of his Saints called St Augustine to go and convert the rest. ...

Britain Conquered Again 不列颠又被征服了 THE withdrawal of the Roman legions to take part in Gibbon’s Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire (due to a clamour among the Romans for pompous amusements such as bread and circumstances) left Britain defenceless and subjected Europe to that long succession of Waves of which History is chiefly composed. While the Roman Empire was overrun by waves not only of Ostrogoths, Vizigoths, and even Goths, but also of Vandals (who destroyed works of art) and Huns (who destroyed everything and everybody, including Goths, Ostrogoths, Vizigoths, and even Vandals), Britain was attacked by waves of Picts (and, of course, Scots) who had recently learnt how to climb the wall, and of Angles, Saxons, and Jutes who, landing at Thanet, soon overran the country with fire (and, of course, the sword). ...